"I know that now, you dick," Klaus says, reaching out to punch Ben lightly in the shoulder with a slight smile on his face. It drops again as Ben continues to talk, and Klaus finds himself wanting to weep in a way that he never, ever allows himself, because Ben is here.
"I know that I made mistakes. A lot of them." They don't have the time to get into all of them right now, but the cult is definitely up there. "I never wanted to hurt anyone. I just-- "
It feels like his entire life has been one precariously stacked house of cards after another. He wants to be in control of everything so badly that he's in control of nothing. He's lost so much, over and over again, but now something somewhere has chosen to give the only constant he's ever had in his life back to him. Sometimes, most of the time, it felt like Ben was the only person in the world who ever gave a fuck about him. Losing him had meant literally losing a part of himself.
And now he's back. Klaus blinks the sting from his eyes and throws his arms around Ben again, hugging him tightly, both of them rocking a little in the sand.
"I don't want them to hate me," he admits, swallowing hard and resting his chin on Ben's shoulder. "But I don't want you to hate me the most."
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Date: 2021-01-03 04:55 am (UTC)"I know that I made mistakes. A lot of them." They don't have the time to get into all of them right now, but the cult is definitely up there. "I never wanted to hurt anyone. I just-- "
It feels like his entire life has been one precariously stacked house of cards after another. He wants to be in control of everything so badly that he's in control of nothing. He's lost so much, over and over again, but now something somewhere has chosen to give the only constant he's ever had in his life back to him. Sometimes, most of the time, it felt like Ben was the only person in the world who ever gave a fuck about him. Losing him had meant literally losing a part of himself.
And now he's back. Klaus blinks the sting from his eyes and throws his arms around Ben again, hugging him tightly, both of them rocking a little in the sand.
"I don't want them to hate me," he admits, swallowing hard and resting his chin on Ben's shoulder. "But I don't want you to hate me the most."